Three

three people. That is how many people know me. In a world of 6,726,487,837 three of them know me. people say they are my friends, that they know who i am but how do you define "know". To me it means how my clock ticks. To know someone you need to know most of everything about them. How they think. that you dont have to act a certain way towards someone to accommodate their needs of a friend because you want to be that friend. How many people are funny? On the exterior we all are. well we all try to be. to make ourselfs feel comfortable with our surrondings. If you sat in a room with three people who know you how would you act? i always wonder. who am i and once i find out who is going to get the chance to meet me? will anyone? will i ever find that one. the one where you know you dont have to be funny or loud or hyper to get their attention? that they know and love just you. me.

paper

money. Is it crazy to think that a piece of paper runs our life. That if you dont have enough of it your screwed or if you have endless amounts you get to do whatever you want.Is it right that the government gets to take the paper you have. That you worked very hard on and then all of a sudden its gone. It was yours, you worked the hours. you earned that paper but yet its gone you cant use it, cant spend it its like you took a sick day. As our country gets deeper in debt whos going to have to pay for it? whats the plan? 11 trillion dollars. Its our paper, we worked for it. We even had to give some of it already are we going to have to give more to pay for our countrys mistakes. Will we have enough to give? All of us are already spending our paper on house bills car bills, things we need. we going to run our country into the ground because our government cant pay our debts, our mistakes. The next depression?

loyalty

Today i taught sunday school. In class i taught about loyalty and how ruth was loyal to naomi. As i was teaching what i thought about the story the metaphor really helped me. Now im really religious and i realized that i should work harder to follow christ because i dont think i work hard enough. Is it me or does every religious person in the world think they are not good enough to be saved by God or that they need to work harder because they are not working hard enough. I think my kids in class are teaching me more than i am teaching them. They think more literal and just say what they feel or think about God. No complication just love. One kid told me that God gave love. Thats all he said and thats really all he needed to say. I was looking for God gives forgiveness and that as long as we believe and are truly sorry he will forgive but instead he said God gives love. To me that is totally true i mean yes it does get more complicated than that but it doesnt have to be. You can think about it at every angle and from every story in the bible but thats it it all comes down to God loving us. I had this epiphany by just teaching my sunday school students.

self

I think im not pretty enough, smart enough, or skinny. I feel like i have to change myself to make me feel better about myself. Everyone does even if they dont notice. People think they have to be something higher then themselves. They have to prettier taller skinnier shorter or dress a certain way. That if we just had surgery on our nose the world would be perfect or if i starved ourselves for a week i would feel better about myself. I always wonder that yes i have alot of friends but do i know the real them? How they feel about themselves. Their real thoughts. I think on some level everyone doesnt think they are good enough. That whatever they do is not up to their personal standards let alone others around us. So when we are in puplic or around our friends are we the same person as to who we are around family or ourselves, or do we fool ourselves too. Humans in general are never satisfied. We crave to be better than others, to be the best.Our looks compete with others wheather they are trying or not.

science vs religion

Everyone has different beliefs. Some people believe in science. Others strongly on God. My one question is why cant the two be the same. Scientists believe in the big bang, Christians believe God created the universe. But why cant it be God created the big bang. Scientists are just so anti-christ and i never quite understood. Daily, science comes up with new miracles so is it really hard to believe that God created miracles too. People need to see whats real. They have to be shown to believe, there really is not any faith anymore.

The power of music

Today i found that song. you know the song that you cant get enough of. That it feels like it changed your life in one way or another or just the voice of the singer gives you such chills you feel like you have to jump into a steaming hot bath to regain control? The feeling is amazing its the feeling that life is going to be ok and maybe you can relate and it makes you feel like.... wow somewhere someone is going through the same thing i am. You feel comforted that your not alone. Well today i found that. I only really get that feeling every once in a while. I could tell you every song that has given me this feeling it makes me remember everything to what went on in that particular day to what i ate for breakfast. I always wonder if i had not heard that song would i be the same person that i am today? could a single song change my life forever? i hope this feeling never goes away, that even when im older and wiser that someone somewhere wrote a song that will change my life or even my point of view. Songs like these make my day and hope the artists who create magic know that today they changed a life for the better